trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
