just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize