I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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