Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
