That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
