hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
