Whod you bang
hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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