Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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