I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
