yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
