Your mouth is God's brothel.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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