turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
