...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
