You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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