Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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