Midget sex pt 2 tonight
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
