We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'm like, not good at living.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
