haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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