She is in my trunk
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Randomize
