Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize
