I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
