just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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