We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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