Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Randomize