is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
