I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
