I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
We had sex on a dog bed..
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
