Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
