Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Randomize
