Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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