love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
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