She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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