im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Randomize
