On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
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