she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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