I have demons in me.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
