Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
