Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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