she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
