guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
