I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
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