I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Randomize
