An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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