im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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