whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize