So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
