No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Just high enough for therapy.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize
