we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize