yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
