Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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